I saw a final cut of THE GATEWAY MEAT, filmed in Massachusetts. I appear in the film, I get brutally murdered and got to write my own death scene. Unfortunately my face is bound up with duct tape and we shot for 8 or 10 hours and I couldn't see and was covered in cold fake blood all day. The DVD will be out soon. The film is AMAZING- oh my god- so gory! I was only in a small part and did not see the script so knew nothing about the plot of the film or anything about it except my scenes.

Also out soon on DVD:

Countess Bathoria's Graveyard Picture Show, which debuted at the Fantasia Film Fest, and which I co-wrote.

I am writing for The Independent Magazine website and will be interviewing Jeremy Kasten, director of the upcoming remake of The Wizard of Gore.

I have an interview in the next Girls and Corpses magazine with Erik Ruhling, author of Infernal Device, an illustrated book of torture devices.

Although I put it aside months and months ago it looks like my script A Fistful of Anger may be optioned.

[READ MORE]

It has been brought to my attention that I appear to be committing Creative & Professional suicide with my very Delicate & Fragile & never even having quite gotten off the ground Film Career.

Even though Death seems to have been hanging around me these last couple of years & people around me have been dropping faster than Elvis & James Dean on a Joy ride with John kennedy in Dallas.... I most certainly have no Intention of Committing Suicide of ANY KIND!....

SO for any of you Ghouls & Thrill seekers that think they smell death & the Putrid, Rotting Decay of a Mal Nourished & twisted mind on display for all to see.... You have most certainly, have come to the Wrong place!

For I am only affecting FREE SPEECH..... ARTISTIC CREATIVITY.... CALLING IT, THE WAY I SEE IT....

FOR I DO NOT CREATE THE WORLDS REALITY..... I JUST COMMENT ON IT!

I have found that most... If not all of the Boston Film people that I have come in contact with are:

FULL OF THEMSELVES.... BRAGGARTS.... & FOOLS...... DELUSIONAL PSYCHOPATHS THAT SEEK TO SUCK THE DREAMS FROM OTHER DEMENTED, LOWER TYPES... & IN THE PROCESS, BUILD THEMSELVES UP INTO SOMETHING THAT THEY ARE NOT.....TO TURN THEMSELVES INTO SOME MAD DEMENTED VISION THEY HAVE OF HOW "TRUE" HOLLYWOOD TYPES ACT & LIVE... BUT BOY, HAVE THEY GOT IT ALL WRONG!

I DO NOT KNOW WHERE THESE PEOPLE ARE BEING FED THIS DERANGED DELUSION OF HOW THEY THINK HOLLYWOOD REALLY IS... BUT THESE SIMPLETONS & FOOLS THAT MIMIC WHAT THEY BELIEVE TO BE THE "REAL" HOLLYWOOD ARE SO INSANELY WRONG THAT IT MAKES THOSE OF US IN THE KNOW.... WANT TO PUKE!

THERE ARE SOME CREATIVE BUSINESS TYPES OUT IN HOLLYWOOD THAT ARE KIND, DECENT HUMAN BEINGS THAT STILL MAKE A FANTASTIC LIVING!

Is it wrong to say what I believe???

What I know to be true???

Is this Suicide??... To speak ones mind??

To say what truly is... As opposed to playing a part of the status Quo that has it all ass backwards, wrong & upside down???

Could I be wrong?... Sure I could..... But I aint!

Am I to be Stoned because I dare to speak my mind?

This is not Professional Jealousy here folks... This is just one man's opinion... ( Mine), & you can take it, or leave it....

All I am speaking about comes from years of attempting to connect with Pro film people out here on the East coast with absolutely NO LUCK AT ALL!

I have tried everything.... Humor... Seriousness... Small talk... Business talk... Jokes... to simply passing out my resume ( a resume, I might ad, that isn't at all very spectacular, but by most standards out here in the Boston circuit... I'm freakin Spielberg! )

So I am left with the completely tormented knowledge that I am NOT QUALIFIED TO WORK FOR EVEN THE MOST LOWELY OF PROJECTS OUT HERE... FOR THE MOST BASIC OF COOKIE CUTTER PRODUCTION COMPANIES ON THE EAST COAST....

When a man comes from Hollywood California... Back to Boston.... & attempts to connect with almost anybody in the local film community... on any level & is practically begging for PA work & still cannot find it...... SOMETHING MUST BE DRASTICALLY WRONG!

I GET ABSOLUTELY LITTLE RESPONSE FROM THE PEOPLE ON THIS BEANYWOOD SITE... (Except a few cool people).

I AM ACTUALLY TRYING TO OPEN A HONEST & REAL DISCUSSION ON BUSINESS ETHICS OUT HERE.....

THE WAY HOLLYWOOD IS PERCEIVED BY NEW ENGLAND FILM WANNA-BE'S....

I LIVED TO SOME DEGREE "THE HOLLYWOOD DREAM"...

ALBIET.... "THE CLASSIC..... HOLLYWOOD DREAM GONE WRONG"... BUT NEVER THE LESS.... I LIVED THE REAL DEAL.... THE HOLLYWOOD LIFE... MAKING MY LIVING IN THE CITY OF LOST ANGELS WHILE THE DEVILS SURROUNDED US DAY & NIGHT.

THESE DEVILS WOULD GET OFF THE BUS EVERYDAY & POINT AT US AS WE MADE MOVIES IN FRONT OF GRAUMAN'S CHINESE THEATRE...

WHILE WE SLAVED AWAY EVERYDAY IN THE LOST CITY OF BRIGHT LIGHTS THAT SHINE DOWN FROM THE HILLS OF MADNESS & BROKEN DREAMS....

LOSING OUR FOOTING ALONG THE WAY... DAY AFTER DAY.... BUT NEVER QUITE FALLING.... & STILL CLIMBING THAT NEVER ENDING MOUNTAIN TO THE TOP OF THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS....

ONLY TO FIND THAT WE WERE STILL... TRULY IN THE GUTTER... & AT THE VERY BOTTOM OF THE BARREL... & HAD TO START OUR ASCENT ALL OVER AGAIN.... TO REALIZE YET AGAIN... ON ANOTHER DAY... THAT WE WERE STILL AT THE BOTTOM OF THE HEAP WITH ABSOLUTELY NO PROGRESS IN SITE....

TO JUST START EVERYDAY.... ALL OVER... TIME & TIME AGAIN... LIKE SOME BAD EPISODE FROM THE TWILIGHT ZONE.... AT THE BOTTOM OF THE HILL!

THIS IS THE HOLLYWOOD THAT I CAME FROM... THE HOLLYWOOD THAT BEATS YOU DOWN DAY IN & DAY OUT WITH NO HOPE IN SITE......

THEN OUT OF NOWHERE...... BANG!....

A SMALL GLIMMERING HOPE OF ESCAPE COMES YOUR WAY & LIKE A PUFF OF SMOKE IN THE NIGHT....

POOF........ YOUR DREAMS DISSIPATE RIGHT BEFORE YOUR EYES & FADE BACK INTO THE SHADOWS... LIKE THE MIST IN THE NGHT..... FROM THE HOT SANTA ANA WINDS THAT ROLL THRU THE DESERT AT DAWN.

THESE ARE THE VERY THINGS THAT SHATTER YOUR SOUL...... BREAK YOUR MIND..... DESTROY YOUR CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF & YOUR FELLOW MAN.....

& THEN THE DAY COMES THAT YOU HAVE HAD ENOUGH.... THAT YOU CAN TAKE NO MORE OF THIS TORMENTED DAMNATION...

THAT YOU CHOOSE TO COME HOME TO PEACE OF MIND & SANITY.... TO FIND SOLACE IN THE DECENCY OF GOOD OLE HOME TOWN AMERICA!

ONLY TO FIND A DENIZEN OF DEMENTED DREAMERS LOST IN THE WANNA-BE LAND OF THE FAST TRACK HOLLYWOOD SHUFFLE...

AND ALL YOU WANT TO DO IS....................."SCREAM!"

IS IT COOL TO BE FAKE?????

IS IT RIGHT TO ACT WRONG????

IS RUDENESS THE ONLY "SHOW BIZ" WAY???

WHEN YOU PEOPLE HAVE BEEN THROUGH A TENTH OF THIS HOLLYWOOD BULLSHIT...

YOU WILL REALIZE THAT THIS FEMALE... THIS DREAM... THIS WOMAN KNOWN AS "HOLLYWOOD"... IS THE BITCH GODDESS FROM HELL...

& THAT SHE WILL SWALLOW YOUR SOUL ALIVE & SPIT YOU OUT THE BOTTOM...

A WASTED SHELL OF A HUMAN THAT YOU ONCE WERE...

THEN.... & ONLY THEN... MIGHT YOU HAVE A SMALL CLUE AS TO WHAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH & WHAT I HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THROUGH OUT ALL OF MY BLOGS HERE ON BEANYWOOD.....

I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO OVER LOOK & IGNORE PEOPLE'S ARROGANT, RUDE, TO COOL FOR SCHOOL BEHAVIOR ON WHAT THEY 'PERCEIVE" THE REAL HOLLYWOOD TO BE LIKE.....

BUT I AM TRULY FED UP WITH THESE CHILDISH & UTTERLY ABYSMAL HUMAN TYPES THAT FEEL THEY ARE "TRUELY" MEANT FOR HOLLYWOOD.... & WITH THAT......

THEY FEEL THE NEED TO LIVE OUT SOME FAIRY-TALE...GUM SHOE Z-MOVIE VERSION OF WHAT THEY THINK "REAL HOLLYWOOD" IS LIKE!

SO THEY SPEND ALL THERE TIME TRYIN TO MIMIC THE HOLLYWOOD BIG BOYS BY PISSING ON ALL THE SMALL DOGS THAT THEY CAN....

ALL THIS DOES IS BREED ILL WILL.... CONFUSION.... & ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING FOR ANYONE!

WHEN THE HELL ARE YOU UPPITY BOSTON FILM TYPES GOING TO GET YOUR HEADS OUT OF YOUR BUMS & OPEN YOUR EYES TO THE REAL WORLD???

A WORLD THAT DOESN'T HAVE TO CRUSH OTHER PEOPLES DREAMS TO GET AHEAD....

A WORLD WERE PEOPLE CAN STILL BE DECENT TO ONE ANOTHER & STILL CREATE SOMETHING GOOD & PROFITABLE...

THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT I RAIL AGAINST....

THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT GAUL ME MOST...

UNMITIGATED UNNECESSARY HUMAN RUDENESS!

WAKE UP PEOPLE OF BOSTON......

DON'T LET THE POD PEOPLE TAKE OVER COMPLETELY......

HILLARY CLINTON IS NOT YOUR FRIEND......

DO NOT BE FOOLED BY DEVILS IN MAKE-UP.....

FOR I AM ONE TO KNOW..... FOR I HAVE SEEN THE DARK-SIDE OF THE LONG NIGHT IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS...

WHERE VERY FEW....... EVER MAKE IT OUT ALIVE!

All I have been doing these last few years is to attempt to find a way to make a God damn Honest & legal living out here on the East coast in the film community....

& I HAVE FAILED MISERABLY!.....

If you wonder why I appear to have an ATTITUDE.....

WOULDN'T YOU?

Signed,
Craig "The X-Hollywood Reject" Amabello

[READ MORE]

I don't know what it takes to get recognized, respected & noticed on this website by the people in charge?

I can't get an email back from them about how to become a "Selected blog".

Or, How to become Acknowledged as a legitimate blogger on this site?

I am like a Ghost in the Machine... A phantom dream... I can't get no damn RESPECT!

They won't put me as a Selected blog.... Or put me on the front page of Past blogs... Or even acknowledge my existence by returning my emails... But they do it for so many others....

But........... NOT FOR ME!.... WHY?

Did I do something wrong???

Did I kick their little doggy??

Did I strangle their Pet Kitty??

This is starting to remind me of my Good ole days in Hollywood when nice Show Biz Celebrities like: Gene Simmons, Lemmy Kilmeister, Jane Seymour, Kirstey Alley, all Hated me & yet I don't recall ever doing anything to them to get such a Violent reaction.

But yet, Sean Lennon enjoyed my company... Angela Bowie thought I was a darling... Ronnie James Dio Protected me... Burt Reynolds told me I did a really great job & my Only True Hollywood Friend "Bruce Campbell" Loved me!... What did these people see in me that so many others couldn't???

Am I to be forever Misunderstood & maligned?

From Coast to coast to Sea to Shining sea...

From Hollywood to Beanywood...

Peons to Stars vacillate between their love & hatred of my personality...

CAN I EVER GET A DAMN BREAK?

I have gotten off the track again...... Back to my point:

I have written 20 blogs here which have included various info on:

Productions in the New England area... With such varied content as: Real Television commercials... Presidential candidate web promos... Motor-cross X game stunt show coverage... Documentary shooting for ER Doctors... Rock & Roll live concert events... Quasi-Religious Short films... I've spoken on such Hot topics as: Show Biz deals, heartbreaks & Busted dreams from the very Beast Herself... "Hollywood".....

But still it seems I do not seem to RATE HERE... Why?

If a guy that spent 12 long years slugging it out in the trenches of Hollywood California...The very CessPit that is Show biz Hell itself... can't get acknowledgment here.... Then what does it take?

I have attempted to broach such topics as Human kindness... Hard work... Creativity... Dedication... Respect for others... Being a Team player... The ethics of doing REAL PAYING gigs....

BUT STILL..... NOTHING... NADA-- ZIP.......

What does a guy gotta do to get recognition here by the POWERS THAT BE?

Am I like some Bastard Step child?... The Black sheep of the family?... The drunken Uncle that says dirty, awkward & embarrassing things at the dinner table in front of mixed company?

I am ever so Confused... Is this Professional Jealousy?... Pettiness? Or just plain Childishness???

What can a poor boy do, But sing for a Rock & Roll band?

Anybody have any clues out there for me?

Anybody wanna give me any pointers on the Human Condition that I don't seem to have a clue about?

Am I just so far gone from banging my head against the brick wall of life that I have lost all of my sense?

I attempt to truly be Enlightening... Humorous... Insightful... Educational... About Hollywood... Life... New England Productions & REAL show Biz Examples....

Is this not what this site is supposed to be about????

I just don't know anymore......

IS IT ME?

So I propose this:

If any of you fine folks of Boston want to see me gone....

To VOTE ME OFF OF THIS BEANYWOOD SITE...

Then please POST YOUR VOTES!

I am SERIOUS!

IF THERE ARE 10 VOTES POSTED THAT WANT ME TO DISAPPEAR....

THEN I WILL GLADLY GO...

I don't want to be were I am not Invited.... Wanted... Or appreciated....

PLEASE.... POST YOUR VOTES...

SHOULD CRAIG AMABELLO STAY BLOGGING ON THIS SITE?

OR DO YOU WANT ME TO GO?

The choice is now left to THE PEOPLE OF BOSTON.

We live in a Democracy.... (Albeit, a very crooked, Corrupt & at times, Insanely Inept bureaucracy, that borders at times on being a Fascist, Dictatorial, Totalitarian Nazi Regime).... So lets see if THE PEOPLE WILL TRULEY SPEAK UP....

CAST YOUR VOTES TODAY... DO NOT DELAY.... TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE....

If 10 of you want me to go... I will go, with my tail between my legs, running back to the Hills, (The Hollywood hills that is)... A place were I seem to fit in much better than here in New England... The place of my Childhood.

IT IS ALL IN YOUR HANDS NOW FINE FOLKS OF NEW ENGLAND.

Oh ya..... Thanks to the few people that have answered my ads... Said nice things about me... & seemed to understand my Eclectic style.... I truly do appreciate your understanding & good will.

And if any of you actors & Actresses out there want to contact me about comedy Sketches I am in pre-production on for really insane, cutting edge & funny Web shows... Please contact me: laconnection101@aol.com.

I am also looking to hitch up with a few cool, dark humored writers to help me put my ideas to scripts for full length feature films & Shorts, please let me know.

Keep believing in yourselves... Don't kick a dog when he's down... & have fun creating cool, entertaining, & Profitable stuff for the Bewildered Masses....

I know I sure am.

Signed,
Your truly Demented Reporter & X-Hollywood Reject,
Craig Amabello

[READ MORE]

Hello Everyone, this is your X-Hollywood reject & truly Demented reporter, Craig Amabello, reporting in from the front lines of New England productions.

DISCLAIMER: Once again, I truly do not mean ALL of you people out here in New England are bad, I know THERE MUST be many fine, talented, creative, hardworking individuals out here.... I just keep running into the truly deranged, egomaniacs with such astounding arrogance that it would even put Gene Simmons from Kiss to shame!

Why, I ask myself am I always running into Braggarts, Simpletons, Fools, Losers, & such untalented Hacks that act like they just came off a feature film working for Martin Scorsese, & taught HIM all that he knows????

I am constantly being treated like absolute shit from people in the New England production community.

Are people like dogs? Am I giving off some kind of SCENT that people can pick up on & I am just totally unaware of?

I swear, every time I am booked for any kind of shoot to work in any capacity on, I am always the LOW MAN on the Totem Pole & yet, I smile, take it like a man, & still put out a good attitude.

I show them a willingness to work, to help others to do WHATEVER it may be to MOVE the production forward. I exude a form of HUMBLENESS that is not FAKE, it is quite real, & yet people INSTINCTIVELY SEEM TO PICK UP ON THIS & START KICKING ME LIKE A DAMN MANGY DOG THAT JUST PEED ON THEIR FAVORITE RUG!

WHAT GIVES?.... What the Hell am I doing wrong? It is truly very Frustrating.

As a child I used to Argue Vehemently with a dear friend of mine (who eventually Blew his Brains out all over the carpet), that "KINDNESS IS A STRENGTH.... A very Powerful form of Strength & Confidence, Caring & Humanity to your fellow earth Beings". He would always say that I was a fool & that I was wrong & that "Kindness was a weakness & will always be perceived as such, by anybody on this planet!".... I am exasperated to think that after all these years, after all my efforts to Exude an Honest, sincere, form of Kindness to Human beings that Danny was right!

PEOPLE ON THIS PLANET SEEM TO ONLY UNDERSTAND STRENGTH.... ARROGANCE... VILE CREATURES THAT BULLY PEOPLE WITH THEIR RUDENESS & DERANGED CHARM.

"KINDNESS APPEARS TO BE A WEAKNESS TO ALL THAT I HAVE ENCOUNTERED"

So where the Hell does that leave a guy like me???

Do I have to become a complete Scum-bag? A complete Rude Pig of a human to get what I want?

How do I get people to take me seriously, without Punching them in the face after they treat me with absolute disrespect?

I truly do not seem to know any more... It disheartens me to be at such a cross roads after so many years of failure with not only LIFE ITSELF... But with the way other Humans beings treat me.

Why am I rambling on about all of this anyways? I just finished a gig the other night where I was working with 2 College grads from a very Expensive & Important Theatre Arts school... These two Clowns, (& that is being really Cruel to Clowns) were completely Rude, arrogant, self absorbed, LAZY, Self Pretentious, WANNA-BE ARTISTS that had no freakin respect for ANYONE or ANYTHING except themselves!

These two "Well Schooled" Morons were so lazy, arrogant & Inept that it took 3 & 1 HALF HOURS TO PUT UP TWO LIGHTS & SET UP A JIB!

Let me repeat that again.... Just so you can really UNDERSTAND & it can Truly SINK IN....

It took 2 guys 3 & 1/2 hours to set up TWO LIGHTS & a JIB!

Is it me, or is that about 3 hours to freakin long?

Let me explain:
I met these two guys on the set, the Director introduced us ( It went something like this.... Craig, this
is my DP, my director of Photography Matt & his cinematographer Joey. This is Craig... he has been
helping me out... THEY were given TITLES & I was given just my NAME & that I HELPED OUT).

Now I know it sounds like I'm Nit Picking, but why is it that every time I'm on a shoot & everyone starts
bandying about Titles, these people usual end up being untalented hacks & rude Idiots that just
cling to their freakin Titles & Demented dream of Hollywood Delusions!

Wherever I go... I'm just Craig Amabello... NO TITLES.... NO BULL.... Just Hi, I'm here to work, help
out in anyway I can, do a good job, get paid & go home...... Is that so bad? Is that so weird?

Do I need to introduce myself As the Grand Wizard of Reality & the Ruler of all Mankind from the
past, present & future?... Is this how one goes about getting respect here on planet earth?

Using big Convoluted 10 cent words & titles that more than naught end up being gibberish for the
foolish to gnaw on like an old bone is to a junkyard dog?

I hate titles... And I truly feel that many people that have NEVER BEEN to HOLLYWOOD.... Or
WORKED in HOLLYWOOD.... CLING TO THESE STUPID TITLES FOR DEAR LIFE... Because they
feel it will Validate them to the uninformed masses.

TITLES ARE BULLSHIT!...... There is truly no need for titles out here.... Yes in Hollywood, where there
are Unions & Guilds & all that powerful stuff, Unfortunately you need titles to play the game... But for
Christ sake people.... WE ARE NOT IN FREAKIN HOLLYWOOD...... Can't we just Mellow the hell out
& be a WEE Bit Normal? Have some damn fun? Create some cool stuff? Without the need to prop
ourselves up with INSANE Bullshit Pretentious Titles that are pretty much just empty words
anyways?......

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..... I get so damn frustrated playing these silly, foolish childish games Over &
Over & Over.... But I NEVER... IN A MILLION YEARS EXPECTED TO PLAY THESE KINDS OF
GAMES OUT HERE, IN NEW ENGLAND WITH SUPPOSEDLY, NICE, Homespun, easy going
Country Folks!

Anyways, my story continues...........

Right from the beginning after meeting these TWO IMPORTANT, WELL SCHOOLED, HOLLYWOOD
types, I said, "Hey what can I do? What do you guys need? What lights are you going to be putting
up? Do you want me to get them? etc, etc, etc..... I was bending over backwards to help out... (Like I
always do on every shoot that I am on), To show these two guys that I was there to HELP the
production run smoothly. To not give attitude, to not disturb the Power flow... (If they were in charge I
thought, So be it. I will make it work & still be polite & courteous to all involved in this production. I am
here to do a professional job & be paid.... I might as well attempt to make it a pleasant experience as
I always do).

I pretty much got NO-RESPONSE.... A couple Mumbled, "I'm Thinking", " lets see", "give me a
minute" etc., type answers, but they both just seemed to be floundering.... DOING NOTHING!

(I must explain here that When these two jokers first showed up on the set the first thing these 2
losers did was to RUN to get PIZZA & left me & the director to carry up almost all of the equipment up
3 flights of stairs into the studio where we were shooting at).

To me this act alone spoke VOLUMES about their Integrity, work ethic, & Presumptuousness!

But even after this, I still bit my tongue & tried to work with these guys.... To help them in anyway
possible to get this shoot going & off the ground instead of laying there like a dead fish for almost 4
hours of senseless waiting!

(I must also explain that the director seems to be a very nice, kindly, quiet man who has never
directed before, he is BRAND NEW to all of this production stuff. So he seemed very much lost as to
how to get the whole show on the road & Unbelievably left it in the hands of these two simpletons
that seemed to Revel in their New Found Power!).

So..... My long winded story continues.........

After doing everything in my power to help out, get the lights out, bring them to the set, get the
scrims, stands, extension cords, etc... IE: I DID ALL OF THE PHYSICAL GRUNT WORK.... THEY
STILL DID NOTHING BUT STAND AROUND & USE CUTE SHOW BIZ WORDS ON EACH OTHER.

I was utterly amazed & appalled by these College Grads behavior.... (Unfortunately I must admit that I
am a lier.... I have seen this type of behavior & attitudes on Sets many, many times before, from coast
to coast & It is just Sickening, aggravating & nauseating to me at this point in my life)

Then the other genius starts acting like he is now the Art director/ Set director etc & wished we had
real live sticks, twigs & rocks on the set to make it more realistic.... So the next thing I know I am out in
the park at dark with the director picking up leaves & junk while the 2 college art boys must have
been laughing their asses off at their ability to act all special & important & DO ABSOLUTELY
NOTHING & how truly easy it was to get flunkeys to do their bidding!!!!!!!!!!

But believe it or not.... I still maintained my cool... I still was not about to sabotage this nice mans
shoot because two rude arrogant, lazy, shiftless punks had somehow managed to TAKE OVER THE
ENTIRE PRODUCTION...... There was Talent on hand... I did not want to poison them with a bad
attitude..... Why should I hurt them? Get everyone upset? So I just shut my mouth & kept being the
LAP DOG to these TWO jokers.......

HOURS HAD FLOWN BY & NOTHING WAS DONE.... ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.......

(The only work that was done up to this point was clearly only the physical work that was done by
the Director & myself)...... Otherwise those two jokers stayed locked up on the set doing God Knows
what & kept at least 8 people waiting).

The director then asked me if I could go down & get a 25 lb. sandbag that the DP was in need of... I
almost said, "let the chubby lil bastard go get it himself"... But no... I put my tongue in my mouth... my
tail between my legs & quietly stewed as a struggled to bring this sandbag up 3 flights of stairs......

When I arrived onto the set & dropped the sandbag, the DP said to me, "Can you bring that over
here?" ... I just walked away & said that I was tired. He then very quickly & curtly stated.... "NO?...
Well thank you very much for your cooperation". It was as if, he was almost in some form of state of
shock that the PEON didn't jump to do his bidding... Very bizarre dweeb this guy was.

(Also, as a side note I found out later that this punk is a Christian Youth Minister... Can you Freakin
Believe that? This crappy attitude & bullshit behavior all coming form some Pretend Christian/
Religious Scum-bag teaching HIS ETHICS to young children? And you wonder what the hell is
wrong with this country at times?)

Anyways....... After this Punk had the audacity to give me lip after I had done nothing but be helpful,
polite & kind to him for the last several hours.... I wanted to FLOOR HIM!

Strangle the lil bastard right then & there..... ruin the shoot...... All because this arrogant, lazy little
puke was for some reason or another under the MisInformed impression that I was HIS LITTLE PA... (
Or should I say, Peon).

Well I don't wanna bore you folks any more with the details, but the shoot finally got under way
almost 4 hours later.... I had done most of the Physical work myself & those two guys where
constantly being deferred to as the Director of Photography & cinematographer etc., while I just stood
around looking & feeling useless & dumb!

And do you know what the first words out of his mouth were once the whole cast, friends & family had finally assembled onto the set?........ "Welcome to Hollywood"..... I wanted to Kick his teeth in.... Last I recall, we were in Freakin Lawrence Mass!

My whole point is this.........

AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT THIS KIND OF CRAP HAPPENS TO OUT HERE WORKING ON NEW
ENGLAND PRODUCTIONS???

Have any of you people out there ever had a situation like this happen to you? If so, could you
please share it with us....

I know that I can not be the only person out here that crap like this constantly & consistently happens
to.....

I would love to hear others stories of nightmare shoots gone to hell....

Not because I want the negativity... But because maybe, others can learn from this very disturbing &
dysfunctional behavior & know that it should not be tolerated any where on ANYONES SHOOT!

I would truly love to know what you other production people out here think of my little tale of
disturbing, lazy, attitudes by College Art school Majors....

Thanx's & I hope all of your shoots out here in New England are fun, productive & Profitable & not
anything like the NIghtmare shoots from Hell that I seem to be working on.

Your X-Hollywood Reject

Craig Amabello

( & yes, the Irony is not lost on me that I DO USE TITLES!... But for all the right reasons)

[READ MORE]

I am not a fancy man.... I did not go to any fancy college.... I am self Taught.... I used to get jobs by word of mouth in Hollywood..... Out here in Boston, I do not know anybody.... So I have been searching for professional production work for several years out here with absolutely no luck at all!

The only way I know how to get work from new clients out here is to send them my resume.

When I do......... I NEVER HEAR BACK FROM ANYONE!

Can anybody out there give me a clue as to what I am doing wrong?

This is a Typical example of what kind of responses I get when I send out my resume to people. Most people never even have the common courtesy to even bother to email me back. But the few that do, ALL seem to have a tendency to be QUESTIONING the validity of my Resume.

POTENTIAL EMPLOYER MR X RESPONSE:

On Sep 4, 2007, at 10:42 PM, MR X wrote:
It's a nice resume but I couldn't find anything about you or Prey of innocence under michael deluise.


MY RESPONSE:

Look Dude.... What the hell do you expect to find?

  I met Michael Deluise while working on Waynes World. We spent a day working together & he got to know me. He liked me, told me he had just shot this little film that he was working on & needed it edited. So 3 weeks later, after Waynes world was wrapped, Michael & I spent 3 days editing his film. At the time I was doing all my editing in my shitty lil apartment in the Valley.

  Editing is intense... Editing under a 3 day deadline is EXTREMELY INTENSE. Michael had already pre-booked a theatre in Burbank to showcase his new film & we had to finish this so that it could be brought to the lab to be blown up to 16 mm film for projection.

  We spent those difficult 3 days, Rolling on the floor laughing... Yelling... Arguing.... Laughing some more... crying, (from laughing so hard) & then we finally finished the edit. It came out pretty good. He liked it. I was happy with it.

  I don't recall if I even put my name on the film as editor. Many projects that I worked on never had my name attached. All I wanted was to be paid & that, was that. I didn't care about stupid credits then, (I do now). Money was all I wanted. I was never expecting to be famous from working on other peoples projects, so payment of services was all I ever cared about. (besides, delivering a good product).

  Michael screened his movie 1 week later to a decent crowd & it was well received. I never went to the premiere, (because that's not the kind of guy that I am). Like I told Angela Bowie a few months later.... "I don't do parties or premieres". I am just weird like that. Screw name recognition, I just wanted money. (Now I do want recognition & MONEY...... Funny how things change with time).

Maybe Michael changed the name of the film. I don't know. Actually, I don't  even remember now what the damn film was about.

Do I have any proof of actual, tangible, photographic or Video evidence of this encounter with Michael Deluise, or my editing work on his film?........................................................................................................................................... NO

Do you think I had a Freakin Biographer following me around & documenting any of this?...................... NO

Was it an academy award nominated film? ......................................................................................................... NO

Did it pick up a golden globe? ................................................................................................................................ NO

was it on tv & recieved 5 Emmy's? ......................................................................................................................... NO

Was it a nice little short film that Michael & his Brother enjoyed making & then hired me to edit?............ YES!


WHAT THE HELL WHERE YOU EXPECTING TO FIND OUT ABOUT THIS MOVIE?????

THAT MY NAME WAS ON THE CREDITS?

AS FAR AS MYSELF IS CONCERNED.....

AT THIS POINT IN TIME........ I'M A GOD DAMN NOBODY.........

WHAT WHERE YOU LOOKING TO "FIND OUT" ABOUT ME?????????

I never claim or claimed that I am anything other than what I am....

A talented professional with a life time in Show business. Which also includes, 25 years experience in the craft of Video Production. I am also a Long time veteran of working & living in Hollywood California, Where I did all kinds of Freelance gigs, for all kinds of Crazy people.

I have just not "Made It" as of yet. It doesn't mean that I am a Lier. My resume has nothing but Low level gigs, that paid crap. But this resume seems to antagonize, agitate & aggravate more people than not!

I have sent my resume out to over 1,500 people in the last several years & I have gotten absolutely ZERO Work from it!

In fact.... I almost never even get a REPLY BACK.

I send my resume out to people in the Boston area that are looking for professionals.

I almost never send my resume out Unsolicited.

These are people with online ads that are specifically looking for professionals.....

SO WHAT GIVES??????

WHAT AM I DOING WRONG????

I AM THOROUGHLY BAFFLED....... FOR THE LIFE OF ME, I CAN NOT EVEN GUESS AS TO WHAT I AM DOING WRONG THAT MAKES PEOPLE QUESTION EVEN A CRAPPY RESUME LIKE MINE?

It's so damn insulting to repeatedly... send my resume off to.... (more than likely, some damn NOBODY).... Not that that  should matter, because people are still people... humans are still humans... We all deserve some sort of respect...

But........ Why do I have a sneaky feeling that its just another bum, with a high & mighty attitude, JUDGING ME.... BECAUSE I SEND OUT A RESUME THAT LOOKS SO DAMN GOOD.....

I AM SICK OF BEING JUDGED MY WHOLE LIFE BY NOBODIES!

DON'T HIRE ME IF YOU DON'T WANT TO.....

BUT DON'T CONSIDER ME A LIER BECAUSE YOU.... FOR SOME REASON OR ANOTHER, CAN NOT BELIEVE THAT MY RESUME IS REAL.

I AM JUST LOOKING FOR GIGS........ NOT TO BE JUDGED ON WETHER OR NOT I HAVE ACTUALLY DONE WHAT I CLAIM I HAVE DONE...... OR IF I AM LYING!

HIRE ME..... GIVE ME 5 MINUTES ON YOUR SET.... & YOU WILL KNOW WETHER OR NOT I AM SOME FAKE, PHONEY, LYING, SCUMBAG REALLY QUICKLY!

AM I INSANE TO FEEL THIS WAY?

AM I CRAZY TO MAKE SUCH A BIG DEAL OF, YET ANOTHER PERSON, NOT HIRING ME.... BUT GOING OUT OF THEIR WAY TO JUDGE ME... QUESTION THE VALIDITY OF WHOM I CLAIM TO BE!

WHAT SCARES ME THE MOST IS THAT..... I AM NOT CLAIMING TO BE SOME BIG TIME DIRECTOR LIKE SAM RAIMI.... I AM JUST CLAIMING TO BE A SMALL, LOW LEVEL PLAYER IN A HUGE FIELD THAT HAS SPENT A LOT OF TIME WORKING IN HOLLYWOOD....

If anyone out there has any other stories that are relative to this I would love to have you post them. I am seriously wondering if it is "JUST ME"...... Or have other people in Boston experienced this odd Phenomonen about the Boston Film community.

Hope you are all having a good life...... Having Fun,

Your Truly Demented reporter & X-Hollywood Reject,

Craig Amabello


On Sep 4, 2007, at 10:42 PM, MR X wrote:
It's a nice resume but I couldn't find anything about you or Prey of innocence under michael deluise


From: Craig Amabello
To: MR X@hotmail.com>
Subject: editor gig

Date: Mon, 3 Sep 2007 01:14:43 -0400

Hi,
   I noticed your post.... I would be perfect for this!...... I am a  Editor & I Specialize in video & audio for the Web.
   I am fast, Professional, & I do great work. I have enclosed my  resume for you to look at.
Thanx's
Craig Amabello
Located in: Southern New Hampshire.

To see samples of my work Check out: http://www.americanartistsinc.com


PROFESSIONAL SUMMARY:
Over 25 years experience in video production as a Director, Camera  Operator, Photographer, Editor, DVD Author, Graphics Artist & Web  Designer. 12 years spent working in Los Angeles California as a  Freelance Director & production company. Extensive skills, talent,  and knowledge of the entertainment Industry.

RELATED EXPERIENCE:

FILM PROJECTS & RELEASES:

BEHIND THE SCENES SPEC DOCUMENTARIES:
Director/Cameraman/Editor: "Army of Darkness", "Wayne's World",  "Where the day takes you", & "The Bodyguard".

PREY OF INNOCENCE:
Editor: film by Michael Deluise of "21 Jump street fame".


TELEVISION PROJECTS & AIRINGS:

HISTORY CHANNEL: "The History of Drugs" Series.
Editor/Colorist: Timothy Leary's segment contributor.

VH1's PORN TO ROCK II:
Cameraman/editor: Segment contributor on Johnny Toxic piece.

HOLLYWOOD ROCKS Pilot Episode:
Cameraman/editor: Featuring Ronnie James Dio, (Black Sabbath), Lemmy  Kilmister: (Motorhead), & Don Dokken: (Dokken).

BOB VILLA'S SHOW:
Audio Tech: Segment on the Cape.

FINIS TV, STATION 1:
 2nd Camera: Interviews with Bon Jovi, M.C Hammer, and Kiss.

THE REAL ESTATE SHOW:
Cameraman/Editor: Various segments on New Hampshire.

HARD COPY:
Audio Tech: Interview with Burt Reynolds.

WNDS TV "CANDLEPIN BOWLING":
Cameraman: Entire season of their #1 Show.

GERMAN TV:
2nd Camera: Bay Watch segment. Interviews with David Hasselhoff & Pam  Anderson.

KTLA NEWS SEGMENT:
Audio Tech: California Governor Documentary piece.

FOX NEWS:
Audio Tech: L.A Mayor reporter piece.

POLITICAL CAMPAIGN PIECE:
 CLINTON 1996 RE-ELECTION PROMO SPOT:
Audio Tech: Various TV Celebrities promo piece for the N.H state  primary.


MUSIC PROJECTS:

SPEC MUSIC VIDEO:
Director/Cameraman/Editor: "Black Label Society".

JOHNNY TOXIC MUSIC VIDEOS:
Director/Cameraman/Editor: "Superwhore", "Slam Jam", & "Happy".


THEATRE GIGS:

HOLLYWOOD ACTORS STUDIO:
Cameraman/Editor: An afternoon with, "Sir Anthony Hopkins".

SCIENTOLOGY CELEBRITY CENTER:
Cameraman: An original Play with Bart Simpson.


LIVE EVENT PRODUCTION:

LIVE CONCERTS AT: "HOUSE OF BLUES", "THE VIPER ROOM" & WAAF'S,  "LOCOBAZOOKA":
Director/Cameraman/Editor: Various Bands & Members of: Aerosmith,  Kiss, Black Sabbath, Ozzy Osbourne, Dio, David Lee Roth, Guns &  Roses, Tesla, Shine Down, Skindred, Clutch, Shadows Fall, Saliva,  Quiet Riot, Motorhead, Alice Cooper, Kansas, Mr. Big, LA Guns,  Cinderella, Steely Dan, Steve Miller, Tin Machine, Rainbow, and many  other bands, Individuals & Artists.

CALIFORNIA BEAUTY PAGEANTS:
Technical Director/Cameraman/Editor: "Miss Hollywood", "Miss  Burbank", & "Cal State Miss Teen".

CALIFORNIA FITNESS PAGEANTS:
Technical Director/Cameraman/Editor: All State Fitness Championship  shows.


PROMOTION PROJECTS & AD CAMPAIGNS:

PEPSI COLA PROMO:
2nd Unit Camera/Audio Tech: Internal Company party Promotion.

TIMOTHY LEARY'S, "last video project":
Graphic Design & Post Production: For Retina Logic.

UNITED AIRLINES:
2nd Unit Camera: Promo Commercial Check.

UNIVERSAL STUDIO'S PROMO:
2nd Unit Camera: Producer Sales Pitch.

M.T.M STUDIO'S PROMO:
Audio Tech: Internal Documentary Piece.

PAPA SKYNYRD:
Editor/Sound Design:  book promo for Lynyrd Skynyrd biography.

BACKSTAGE PASS:
Cameraman/Editor: Angela Bowies Promo For book tour.

PARAMOUNT PICTURES:
Cameraman/Editor: Promo for "The Mommies TV Pilot".


INDUSTRIALS & COMMERCIALS:

SKEECHERS:
Audio Tech: Commercial

AVIS RENT A CAR:
Audio Tech: Commercial

NORTHROP INDUSTRIES:
2nd Unit Camera/Sound Design: Industrial Internal Video.

LOS ANGELES POLICE DEPARTMENT:
Audio Tech/Editor: Interview of Chief Darrel Gates for Internal use.

METROLINK SAFETY VIDEO:
2nd Unit Camera/Audio Tech: In-house Training video.


SPECIAL SKILLS:

Director, Cameraman, Still Photographer, Technical director, Jib/Boom  Operator, "Rock solid" hand held camera operator, Live Multi-Camera  Switcher, DVD Author, Off-line/Online Editor, Web Designer, Graphics  artist, Musician, Sound Designer, Etc.

EQUIPMENT LIST:

I CAN GET ANY PIECE OF GEAR, IF GIVEN 24 HOURS NOTICE.

But I do Own:

3 Macintosh Desktop Computers: (Dual 1 Ghz G-4 / G-4- 450 MHz / Mac  9500) Digital Video/Audio/Graphics Production Editing Suites Set-up  with: (Adobe Premiere, Final Cut Pro, DVD Studio Pro, Photoshop,  After Fx, Pro Tools & Digital Performer.
Cinema Products: 16 MM Crystal Sound Sync Film Camera.
Sony VX-1000: 3 Chip Digital video camera.
Sony Mavica: 4 Megapixels Digital Still Camera.
Canon Rebel: 35MM Still Camera.
Basic Lighting Package: 5- 650 Watts Lights. 1-1K. Umbrellas &  Reflector.
Basic Audio Package: Wireless & HandHeld Mics.

Thanx's
Craig Amabello

Contact me @:  Laconnection101@aol.com


To see samples of my work Check out: http://www.americanartistsinc.com

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Hello good people of Beantown. This is Craig Amabello your truly twisted & demented reporter signing in again.

  For an X-Hollywood reject like myself, I sure am receiving a fair share of good responses & emails from some very Cool people out there that are enjoying my blogs.

  I thank you all for the compliments & I am glad that I have opened up a SERIOUS, (yet, demented & silly) discussion on Hollywood verses Boston.

  Entertainment has always been my game, & as long as I can see that some people out there are being entertained (& hopefully Informed), by my writing style, than I will keep on blogging.

  Many Boston people out there keep trying to Insinuate that "what I have done" & "where I have done it" means NOTHING! But that is a bunch of CRAP!

I know in life, it is MOSTLY "WHO YOU KNOW", but damn it..... You just can not discount the fact that I spent 12 long hard years in Hollywood bustin my ass & I have very little to show for it in Tangible goods. But I most certainly have LOTS of Knowledge on Hollywood California that many people out here could truly benefit from.

  Most people out here dream of going to Hollywood & already have what they think is "necessary attitudes" to prepare them to go to the Big city of Lost Angels.

  But their attitudes SUCK. All big words.... Saying things like: "Get me a C-64" as opposed to just asking for a damn clothes pin! People out here are TRYING SO DAMN HARD to emulate what "they think" is standard procedure in Hollywood.... & boy let me tell you.... They have it all wrong!

  People are people everywhere.... But Condescending attitudes, smarmy looks, big 50 cent words, DO NOT MAKE YOU HOLLYWOOD READY! You have to be able to Actually, Physically DO THINGS... ACCOMPLISH WORK. As opposed to just being able to BOSS people around, saying film maker terms, Pointing your finger & putting on your Director & Producer hat & just staring at a monitor all day.

  Many days I had to shoot an entire short story, Documentary, Industrial, Music video, with limited scripts & NO pre-production in just 24 hours. There are NO BOOKS FOR THAT. You have to be able to wing it, & communicate with people to get the job done. Every time I worked on a production in LA with a producer or director that did nothing but bark orders, the day would not only be miserable, but VERY NON-PRODUCTIVE.

  All these college edumacated Directors & Producers out here, with big 10 cent words, but NO REAL LIFE, PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE, make me laugh. Experience that I have, after actually working in the trenches of LA. Experience that has taught me that no matter how nice I try to be to people out here, they think, or assume.... "I BROUGHT MY HOLLYWOOD ATTITUDE BACK WITH ME!". I don't have an attitude, that's what confuses people. I just want to work.

  Do you want to know how I learned my craft of digital film production? By Doing it! Not dreaming about it... Not learning fancy terms... NOT talking about it.... Not getting others to do my work for me.... Not getting on a high horse & acting all full of myself. I just did it because I had to to make a living & survive. To learn to Light, Direct, Shoot & Edit, can truly only be done by DOING IT YOURSELF! No one taught me, no one was there to catch me if I fell. I had to PRODUCE WORK, or I was FIRED.

  In the 12 years of working in Hollywood "I NEVER CALLED MYSELF A DIRECTOR". But that's what I was. I must have directed at least 100 projects. I almost never had MY NAME on credits... I just wanted to get paid. A title meant nothing to me. Out here, many people seem to be more in Love with their damn titles than anything else! You would be amazed at the amount of Directors & producers, here in Boston, that I have emailed, spoken to & written to that haven't even done any real PAYING GIGS! Yikes.... Is it me? Am I stupid? Do I have it all backwards? Have I truly gone insane? Or am I just old fashioned? My philosophy is simple: Work well with others. Do the best work you can. Treat people with respect & just GET THE JOB DONE. Save the big words & titles for MORONS that think thats what's important.

  This is what gauls me with these Producers & Directors out here, acting like big shots, & treating me like shit, with no respect, like I'm just some loser that fell off the turnip truck. I don't have BIG TIME credentials, or a perfect resume with big projects & big names. But at least a million people have seen my work, from cable, to tv, to DVD's, training tapes ect. But for the most part, when I am trying to get gigs out here, I am treated like some rank amateur. A bum. A lier. A loser. And boy let me tell you, IT GETS FRUSTRATING.

  So if it sounds like I am constantly blowing my own horn..... Its because I am punch drunk from having to explain myself to others out here. All I want is PAYING GIGS... I don't care what it is... As long as it is LEGAL, I'll do it. Just treat me with some common courtesy & respect & pay me when the day ends.

  I have bent over backwards to give people information about myself when applying for gigs. I have been polite, courteous, kind, complied with all their requests & for the most part.... I NEVER HEAR BACK FROM THESE PEOPLE.

  So Bizarre. So Weird. People advertising out here that they need a Pro Editor... Pro Director... Pro camera operator..... & when I send them my resume, they just Blow me off!

  The people that run this site STILL REFUSE TO EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE MY BLOGS & won't even put them up under the new postings section....... WHY?????..... I am getting good responses from my blogs. I believe I am driving some traffic to this site & helping this site by writing my point of view on Hollywood. Getting people involved. Opening up real discussions about the business. Hopefully entertaining people. Hopefully Giving them some insight into Hollywood verses Boston.........

But I STILL DO NOT GET RECOGNIZED AS POSTING NEW BLOGS UNDER THE "NEW BLOGS SECTION!

After my very first blog... Lindsay said "that I was surely Blacklisted now!" I thought she was kidding. Obviously my opinions piss people off. People that are shallow... Jealous & just plain don't get it.

  I am honestly trying to contribute to this site & yet I am being FREEZED OUT by the people in CONTROL........... IT MAKES NO DAMN SENSE.

  To me it just shows the small minded nature of so many people out here in Boston, ( & yes, the rest of this country is no better).

  I am done rambling... Sorry to bore you with my tirades... But I am hoping that some of you people out here get what it is I am saying.

LEAVE THE ATTITUDES AT HOME. Show up for work, be creative... HAVE FUN.... make money.

  SHOW BUSINESS is a job, just like any other job.... I just wish more people understood that & would stop watching so much damn TV that makes them think Hollywood wants people that are ALL ATTITUDE & COOL.

All Hollywood wants is:  people that can make em money & not be a pain in the ass to deal with.

LEARN TO BE REAL PEOPLE.... HAVE CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELVES... WITHOUT ABUSING OTHERS.

We are all just people, trying to get thru life & have some fun....

WHY MUST THAT BE SO DAMN DIFFICULT!

Not everyone in Hollywood is as demented and Useless as Paris Hilton!

I wish all the cool people out there.... A long life... Happiness... Health... Fun... Sex & Success!

Rock On.

From your truly demented reporter of life,
Craig Amabello

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