Hello Boston.... Hello Beanywood.... This is your good ole X-Hollywood Reject, Craig Amabello reporting in from the bottom of the barrel of life in New England.

  After 5 years of laboring in Vain... Sending out OVER 3,000 RESUMES... Approximately 6,000 Emails.... Countless phone calls.... Attempting to get ANY KIND OF LOW BUDGET FILM & VIDEO PRODUCTION WORK out here in New England.... Offering myself to individuals.... Companies.... Groups of people that may need a Professional DIRECTOR... SHOOTER... OR EDITOR with 25 YEARS EXPERIENCE...... I have come to the sad & Frustrating conclusion that......

  It is impossible for ME to get ANY CRAPPY LOW PAYING GIGS OUT HERE DOING ANY CRAPPY LOW BUDGET PRODUCTION!!!!!

I GIVE UP ON THE BOSTON FILM MAKING COMMUNITY.... ON NEW ENGLAND DIRECTORS... ARTISTS... BUSINESSMEN & WOMEN.....

  ON BOSTON & NEW ENGLAND PEOPLE IN GENERAL!

  OR ANYBODY OUT HERE FOR THAT MATTER..... THAT EXPECTS YOU TO WORK LIKE A FRIGGIN "SLAVE" FOR NOTHING BUT THE BETTERMENT OF THEMSELVES & THE PROMISE OF "MAYBE" PAYING GIGS SOMEDAY IN THE DISTANT FUTURE!!!!!!!!!!

  In 12 years.... On my WORST day's in Los Angeles.... On my Worst Gigs.... Shooting PORN.... For Low Budget.... DERANGED, NAZI, SCUM-BAG, FOREIGNERS... I Made MORE Money & was TREATED BETTER..... THAN ANY GIG I HAVE BEEEN OFFERED OUT HERE IN NEW ENGLAND IN 5 YEARS!!!!!!

Just let that sentence sink in for a minute Folks..... Imagine how BAD my Lowest Paying & Worst Days out in HOLLYWOOD could have been....... & THEY STILL HAVE BEEN BETTER DAYS & PAY..... THAN ANY GIGS EVER OFFERED OUT HERE!!!

That THOUGHT alone..... is so very disturbingly twisted & sad on SO MANY LEVELS.... as to actually BOGGLE THE IMAGINATION.... & MELT the Mind of any Vaguely, Self Respecting human being that would make ANYONE HOLD THEIR HANDS UP & SCREAM........

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH THS PICTURE??????".... "WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?"

I AM OFFERING MYSELF LIKE A CHEAP 10 DOLLAR TAIWANESE LADY BOY AT 3 AM ON A SATURDAY NIGHT IN BANGKOK WITH A ROOM FULL OF DRUNKEN, WHITE, AMERICAN BUSINESSMEN...... & I STILL GET NO OFFERS!!!!!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..........

  What Amazes me is even more IS.... HOW THE HELL DO ALL YOU REST OF YOU PEOPLE OUT HERE IN NEW ENGLAND MAKE A LIVING DOING PROFESSIONAL PRODUCTION WORK ????

  I don't have a freakin clue anymore than an Opium smokin Chinamen in a French Whorehouse selling vibrators to Lithuanian Lesbian Nuns, While Catholic Priests try to start their own Daycare center for School boys & can't fathom why..... things ain't going right for them!!!!

  I am sick of PRETENTIOUS NOBODIES demanding MEETINGS & offering NO PAYING GIGS in Return! The few offers that I have had have been for NO MONEY... Just A Bunch of TALK about BACK END DEALS that MAY make us all lots of money somewhere in the future for some FAR OFF potential Projects.... BUT FIRST.... I NEED YOU TO WORK FOR ME FOR FREE!

  That Crap talk is for LOSERS... BY LOSERS... & let me tell you...

  ONE PERSON out of 1,000,000 MAY be worth that kind of CONSIDERATION.....

But none of these EGOTISTICAL... LOUDMOUTH.... SELF BLOATED... SELF RIGHTEOUS... IDIOTS that I have talked to out here are even worth doing business with for ANY money at all!!!!

  REALITY CHECK:.... In the REAL WORLD.... You don't have your toilet fixed BUT FIRST TELL THE PLUMBER you need to have a meeting with them so that YOU can CHECK THEM OUT & then explain to them that if this job PAYS NO MONEY.... BUT if it goes ok... In the future you might have several more jobs for them that are much BETTER & ACTUALLY PAY REAL MONEY!!!

  In what TWILIGHT ZONE DO THESE "ARTY FARTY"... SELF INVOLVED MORONS come from to think that this is not only NORMAL BEHAVIOR & LOGIC.......

BUT...... THAT IT HAS ACTUALLY BECOME "ACCEPTABLE".... & "STANDARD" PRACTICE OF DOING BUSINESS IN THE "MOVIE WORLD" OUT HERE!!!!!

  This is all BULLSHIT SOCIO-PATHIC BEHAVIOR!.....

  Don't EVER... let ANYBODY Convince YOU otherwise!!!!!!!!!

  My last offer for work came from a Boston Business man that is running the "Boston Music Festival" and all he wanted from me was:

  Put together 5 video production crews (of at least 3 people each) to shoot at 5 different nightclubs a night at destinations All over Boston for 5 straight days covering over 130 bands, (Also needing me to SHOOT Camera Myself at one of the clubs each night) & then put together an edited show for Broadcast on Cable, then do a DVD for "Best of performances", another edit for Website exposure, & one more video for the individual bands & only wanted to set up several KEY meetings with me & the other BIG Producers, cable company & businessmen while also scouting the locations of half a dozen nightclubs!

  & get this............. HE WAS GOING TO MAKE ME A WEBSITE FOR ALL OF THIS WORK!!!!!!

  In the REAL WORLD.... NOT THE BOSTON INSANE WORLD....

  This was a $10,000 dollar gig just for myself.... And that would be a rock bottom low end price tag!

 And this guy actually had the nerve to tell me that my Credentials were IMPRESSIVE & THAT HE HAD SEEN SAMPLES OF MY WORK & WAS SURE THAT I WAS NOT ONLY TALENTED, BUT HIGHLY SKILLED & THAT I WAS THE MAN FOR THE JOB & THAT HE DESPERATELY NEEDED THE SERVICES OF SOMEONE WITH MY BACKGROUND & KNOWLEDGE!!!!!!

  & then he called me & emailed me several times BAFFLED that I wouldn't return his calls & set up Meetings with him & his people!

  & then when I Politely & calmly & Professionally explained to this MADMAN That I work for Gringo dollars & actually need to MAKE REAL MONEY to PAY actual bills because My IMAGINARY FRIENDS JUST DON'T LIVE IN MY MIND! He actually got INDIGNANT & MENTIONED THAT HE WAS POTENTIALLY GOING TO THROW A QUARTER OF A MILLION DOLLARS WORTH OF BUSINESS MY WAY & I WAS ACTING EXTREMELY UNPROFESSIONAL BY "BLOWING HIM & HIS OFFER OFF!"

  Now Kids.... I ain't smokin crack... & I am not Delusional, or IMAGINING THESE THINGS..... But how could any SANE HUMAN BEING SAY THIS CRAP TO SOMEBODY & NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THEY ARE NOT TAKEN SERIOUSLY??????

  So I am Utterly Baffled here folks..... I have no clue as to how I'm going to Survive.... Or how I'm going to get through this drought & RUT I'm in...... But I'll tell you this kids... I am no longer going to SUFFER THESE DELUSIONAL, INSANE, EGOMANIACS OUT HERE IN BOSTON ANY LONGER!!!!!

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH...... I HAVE TO HOLD ON TO MY LAST SHRED OF DIGNITY & SAY "SCREW THIS BULLSHIT!"

  It's sad.... But there are so many SMALL minded people.... So many JEALOUS PEOPLE OUT HERE IN BOSTON.... SO MANY PEOPLE LIKE....  "L S" (yes, the one from your very own Beanywood site) that act, think, walk & talk like THEY are "IN THE KNOW, HOLLYWOOD SHOW BIZ PEOPLE"...

  But in fact are just very egomaniacal, jaded, close minded, Snobby, Elitist individuals that want to keep others down... refuse to Communicate (because god knows I have tried several times to get in touch with her & have always been extremely polite & Ass kissey... But this has been of no avail to me anyways)....

  & I truly Hope you Good people out there understand that this type of behavior is SYMPTOMATIC OF NARCISSISTIC, PRETENTIOUS, BETTER THAN THOU, ARTY FARTY I AM "OH SO MUCH MORE HOLLYWOOD THAN YOU CRAP" That is bringing this city into the GUTTER FASTER THAN THE TWIN TOWERS COULD FALL!

  We don't need another Arrogant idiot with power trying to build themselves up by tearing others down & feeling oh so SUPERIOR in the Process!!!

Boston people need to be Rational..... Human.... REAL....

STOP PRETENDING YOU'RE FROM HOLLYWOOD!!!!

HOLLYWOOD IS FULL OF SICK, TWISTED SCUM!

If this town ever has a chance of giving Talented, decent, hardworking, creative people a chance.... It needs to get real & come down of it's High Horse & start making sense in the REAL WORLD!

NOT THE STUPID SCREWED UP FAKE WORLD OF HOLLYWOOD!

1 HOLLYWOOD IS BAD ENOUGH KIDS....... WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER!

So to all the Decent, Talented & hardworking people out here in New England (because I know there MUST be at least a few of you out there)..... I wish YOU luck!

I have HIT A BRICK WALL out here in Boston..... I need to Re-Think.... Re-Plan... Re-build, what I was already trying to rebuild from my Twisted life left over from my Hollywood yesteryears.

But I do know this kids from experience.... Don't TRY to ACT like HOLLYWOOD.... HOLLYWOOD SUCKS!

  Just be yourselves... Be real... Be decent to other Human beings.... Hollywood is HOLLOW.... SHALLOW.... HEARTLESS.... UNFORGIVING...... CRUEL... EMPTY.... DEAD.... COLD.

Ask yourself this people... Is this what you want to be when YOU grow up? Is that what you Aspire to? I hope not.

Wish me luck kids.....

Because..... As dear ole Bon Scott from AC/DC always said: it's a "LONG WAY TO THE TOP..... IF YOU WANNA ROCK & ROLL"!

  Goodbye for now,
 from your X-Hollywood Show Biz Rebel......... Craig Amabello

P.S: Always remember to check out my work, Thoughts & Life at http://www.youtube.com/CraigsRealTv

Because Boys & Girls.... I will ALways tell it like it is..... EVEN IF IT HURTS Both..... YOU & ME!

Live life with NO REGRETS!

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Hello Beanywood.... Hello New England Film Makers..... How are your lives going?????

Mine is in the gutter..... This site doesn't even acknowledge my existence after 25 posts & over 14 thousand views....... But hell.... I'm just a nobody BUM that spent 12 year working & living & paying my BILLS in HOLLYWOOD... Ya know... The "REAL DEAL".... A guy that knows SOMETHING about Hollywood... But I'm just POND SCUM compared to the REAL players out here in NEW ENGLAND!

So here's what I've been up to..... I got my first gig EVER out here in New England after almost 4 YEARS OF BEGGING PEOPLE FOR ANY CRAPPY PRODUCTION JOB..... It was as an editor for an online gambling website located in Beverly Mass... The pay was $17.25 an hour.... Just enough for me to buy crack.... (NO Hookers), Just lousy Crack... Anyways I took the job.. Smiled... worked hard... kept my mouth Shut & listened to MORONS Bossing me around.... I did what I was told... & after less then 2 months.... After going through 2 BOSSES... (the first being a nazi, Gestapo Rude Arrogant Loser... Who called himself a DIRECTOR... & spent all day trying to figure out ways to boss me around & I took his CRAP Daily.... HE was finally FIRED..... & then my NEXT boss... ended up being the SON of the owner... A completely UNHINGED, DERANGED, DANGEROUS, PSYCHOPATH of a LOSER who's LIFE'S AMBITION was to be a COP!!!!!!..... Long story short.... This pathetic loser... Who for some screwed up reason had the audacity to claim to be MY boss... ended up CHASING me OFF the JOB by threats of TAZERING ME.... Assaulting ME... BEATING ME up... (Because I refused to TEACH HIM Final Cut Pro) & HE was going to HUNT ME DOWN & GET ME.... All because I refused to take HIS CRAP anymore...... I never got payed my last weeks pay.... (I have since gone to the Mass Attorneys General's Office & complained about my pay & how I was THREATENED & CHASED OFF THE JOB.... & have not been PAYED as of YET.... BU T THEY are still looking into it!!!!!)..... And FOLKS...... That was just my FIRST & ONLY JOB offer that I finally got out here in NEW ENGLAND!...... So ya gotta wonder Folks..... Who the hell else is working out here for MONEY????..... Anyways..... Lets fast forward to just the other day...... After sending out over 2,000... Yes Kids, that's right..... OVER TWO THOUSAND Emails to EVERYBODY.... Looking for ANY kind of WORK..... I RECEIVED a COUPLE RESPONSES!!!!!!!!..... Whoopee!!!!!!!.... YAhhhhhhhhh.....

Here's response ONE: It was for an ad making $50 dollars a day as a BOOM Operator.... Yes sir, FIFTY big ones a DAY!.... I Gladly responded not once.... but TWICE with my PHONE NUMBER & QUALIFICATIONS & RESUME WITH LINKS TO MY WORK...... For $50 Freakin Bucks a DAY!..... I received a email back with NO NAME.... NO NUMBER...... NO INFORMATION WHATS SO EVER......... Just the CRYPTIC Words...... WE might be all set for this Boom gig... BUT HANG TIGHT..... WE MIGHT BE CALLING YOU!.... Zooweee..... Wowee....... THEY "MIGHT" be callin ME???????...... I eventually received a CALL at 7:00 AM On a Sunday Morning &, believe it or not... I MISSED THE CALL!!!!!!...... When I called the number back... (there was no Message.... NO Name... NO NUMBER.... & NO reference whatsoever as to what the call was about) I reached a Women who stated that HER Brother was making a MOVIE & MAYBE he HAD called ME?????..... Believe it or not... I still left MY NAME & NUMBER & REASON for calling & have YET RECEIVED a CALL BACK!!!!!!

Here's an example of another Response from another GREAT NEW England Film Maker........

RESPONSE NUMBER 2: This guy had an AD Looking for a camera man to shoot in DOWNTOWN Boston Mass for 3 HOURS with a PROFESSIONAL CAMERA..... I SENT him all MY info & patiently waited for a reply.... After several hours & hear back from him & the gig paid $60. Dollars...... Thats Right FOLKS..... SIXTY DOLLARS!!!!!!

Whopppeeeeee..... Zoweeeeee......... I can't believe MY good Fortune!.... I quickly & Politely EMAILED HIM right back & stated: Make it, $100 dollars.... & you have a deal!....... NEEDLESS TO SAY....... I NEVER HEARD BACK FROM THIS BIG TIME, NEW ENGLAND ENTREPRENEUR.........

& the FINAL KICKER OF THE DAY....... (This all occurred Yesterday folks, On Sunday May 11, 2008)... I emailed an AD FOR A BIG NEW ENGLAND CASTING COMPANY Looking for a CASTING DIRECTOR.... I told them, my background was primarily in Video Production, But that I was looking to EXPAND my horizons & felt that I could be quite good at working for a New England Casting Agency considering that I spent 12 years Working & Living in Hollywood California & that I have over 30 years in the Entertainment Business.......

I will now give you an EXAMPLE OF OUR EMAILS:


MY FIRST EMAIL RESPONSE TO THIS AD FOR WORK AT A NEW ENGLAND CASTING AGENCY:

On Sun, May 11, 2008 at 12:29 AM, Craig Amabello wrote:
Hi,
I noticed your post... I am qualified in video production & have over 30 years experience in Show business... I would like to speak with you about this position... Maybe I could be the right candidate for the job... I am looking to expand my horizons & would feel right at home dealing with many sorts of talented actors, etc.

I have enclosed my resume for you to look at.
Thanx's
Craig Amabello
Located in: Southern New Hampshire.
Contact me @: Laconnection101@aol.com

And of course my resume shows my MANY YEARS EXPERIENCE IN VIDEO PRODUCTION....

I then receive THIS BACK AS A REPLY FROM THIS BUSINESS PERSON...

On May 11, 2008, at 1:58 PM, XXXXXXX wrote:

Hi,

What can you offer Our Casting Company?


SO I THEN.... CALMLY... PROFESSIONALLY..... ANSWER HIM BACK WITH THIS, SINCERE RESPONSE!


On Sun, May 11, 2008 at 2:23 PM, Craig Amabello wrote:

A) I'M HONEST......
B) I'M HARD WORKING......
C) I'M INTELLIGENT.......
D) I AM GOOD WITH PEOPLE......
E) I'M CREATIVE...... I write, make music, do photography & do Video....
F) I CAN SHOOT VIDEOS OF YOUR TALENT FOR AUDITIONS
G) I CAN SHOOT STILLS OF ALL YOUR TALENT FOR HEAD-SHOTS, ETC.
H) I CAN GIVE DIRECTION.... OR I CAN TAKE DIRECTION... I'm a team player.

And I have a good, basic, common sense about ALL the basics of Show business.... With over 35 years involvement.

Do you have any other questions that I could answer for you?
Please feel free to ask me anything.
Thanx's
Craig Amabello



and this piece of crap MORON scum-bag HAS THE AUDACITY TO EMAIL ME BACK & SAY!


On May 11, 2008, at 2:26 PM, XXXXXXX wrote:

Thats wonderful Craig...but really didn't answer my question. WHAT CAN YOU OFFER MY COMPANY?



So I email this absolutely, Arrogant, Delusional, Hollywood WANNABE .... THIS RESPONSE:


May 11, 2008 5:31:33 PM EDT
To: XXXXXXXX

From Craig Amabello:


MONEY?... BAGS OF GOLD?.... The best WHORES IN THE LAND?... DRUGS?????...... An Invitation to the White House????

DUDE.... I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU MEAN BY THAT QUESTION???

IT'S A VERY NEBULOUS QUESTION.... VERY VAGUE..... VERY ESOTERICAL????

PLEASE.... I'M JUST A DUMB COUNTRY BOY WITH NO COLLEGE EDUCATION....

I LIKE THINGS SIMPLE & SWEET & SPELLED OUT FOR ME!!!!!!


I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU WANT ME TO SAY??????

I AM NOT GOOD AT PLAYING GAMES....... I'M A SIMPLE GUY......

REALLY DUDE..... DON'T YOU THINK YOUR GETTING A LITTLE STRANGE WHEN I DO THE BEST I CAN TO ANSWER SUCH AN OPEN ENDED QUESTION SUCH AS YOU GAVE ME & THEN YOU EMAIL BACK & SAY I DIDN'T ANSWER YOUR QUESTION????

CHRIST........ TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT??????????


This ALL pretty much explains MY HATRED TO THE NEW ENGLAND FILM COMMUNITY...... ALL THE PEOPLE THAT I HAVE COME IN CONTACT WITH OVER THE PAST 4 YEARS ALL ARE SO DESPERATELY ATTEMPTING TO " MIMIC" WHAT THEY THINK HOLLYWOOD TYPE PEOPLE WOULD ACT LIKE...........


PEOPLE.... THIS IS SO EVER WRONG!!!!.... Will will you people ever learn??????

Hollywood is made up of MOSTLY money GRUBBING sharks that would RAPE your lil sister or your mother for the next BIG DEAL!!!!

So many of YOU "NEW ENGLAND" FILM PEOPLE are so DESPERATELY TRYING TO MIMIC & FOLLOW THIS TYPE OF ATTITUDE & BEHAVIOR that it is DESPICABLE!.... DISGUSTING!!!!!!..... DEPLORABLE!!!!!...


PLEASE PEOPLE....... PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO MIMIC!!!!!!!

TO BE JUST ANOTHER HOLLYWOOD SCUM-BAG DOES NOT MAKE YOU CLEVER..... BETTER.... NOR, PROFESSIONAL.....

WE ARE HUMAN BEINGS HERE FOLKS..... WHY CAN'T WE HAVE THE SIMPLE COMMON COURTESY TO TREAT EACH OTHER WITH RESPECT??????


TRUST ME PEOPLE.... I AM ONE OF THE "ONLY PEOPLE" ON THIS DAMN SITE THAT HAS SPENT 12 LONG YEARS WORKING & LIVING IN HOLLYWOOD....... I HAVE SOME KNOWLEDGE OF THE PLACE.... I HAVE SOMETHING VALID TO SAY!!!!......

PLEASE PEOPLE.... I BEG OF YOU.... STOP TRYING TO MIMIC THE "WORST OF HOLLYWOOD!".....


Try to act like decent, civil, human beings with a little respect for other humans........ Life can still be good this way...... PLEASE PEOPLE...... UNTIL YOU HAVE SPENT THE AMOUNT OF TIME THAT I HAVE SPENT DEALING WITH HOLLYWOOD ASSHOLES........ YOU WILL SOON REALIZE WHAT A SIN IT IS.... FOR "ALL OF US" TRYING TO DEAL WITH "PRETEND" WANNA-BE HOLLYWOOD ASSHOLES!!!!!!!!!!!

DOES ANYBODY OUT THERE HEAR WHAT I AM SAYING??????

DOES ANYTHING I SAY MAKE SENSE TO ANYBODY OUT THERE??????

I AM SO LOST & FRUSTRATED OUT HERE IN NEW ENGLAND..... KNOWING THAT ALL I DEAL WITH OUT HERE ARE LOUD MOUTH WANNA-BE HOLLYWOOD SCUM........

IT HURTS US ALL..... NOT JUST AS A BUSINESS.... BUT AS A PEOPLE AS A WHOLE!

PLEASE..... I BEG ALL OF YOU TO HEED MY WORDS.... THIS IS WHY AFTER 12 YEARS OF LIVING & WORKING IN HOLLYWOOD THAT I LEFT!

I COULDN'T STAND THE FAKE... PHONEY.... BULLSHIT... RUDE... ARROGANT BASTARDS ANYMORE!!......

& NOW I COME BACK HOME TO NEW ENGLAND & FIND EVERYBODY & THEIR BROTHER TRYING TO MIMIC THIS VERY SAME BEHAVIOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PLEASE PEOPLE....... WHAT I AM SAYING IS TRUE!.... I CAN NOT BE THE ONLY ONE EXPERIENCING THIS BEHAVIOR OUT HERE!!!!!

GROW UP....... BE HUMAN.... STOP BEING RUDE, DELUSIONAL ASSHOLES!!!!!!!!

From your very SAD, DEPRESSED X- HOLLYWOOD REJECT...... Craig Amabello.....

I will always tell it like it is...... Please people.... HEED MY WARNINGS!!!!!!!!!!

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Hope all of you wonderful people have fun at the big shin dig tonight....

Me? I can't go because I gotta start writing my memoirs so that I can sell myself... (yes, Just like a REAL Prostitute does) so that I can finally start getting my life & times on film & make a few hundred million. ( I'm running a little short on cash these last few years, with Hollywood Leaving me flat broke, In-debt, shattered & completely Unhinged and all).

Did I ever mention what a Horrible Bitch Goddess Hollywood truly is? The Land of the Leapers... The land of the Un-dead... The City of Lost Souls & Lost Angels... The blackness from within the golden realm of Globes & the hardened Angels of alcoholic Oscars, that roam the studio back-lots never change.

As the interns drive themselves over the cliffs of insanity on those twisted mountainous roads, on the way up to their Masters Malibu Mansions that sit on the edge, of the Brink of disaster... These masters, who themselves, are spiraling out of control on their own way down, as these newcomers climb up, just to descend into the beginning of the end.

The sickness rolls in, like the thick smog that stretches thru the night & into the hot desert dawn, as the daylight breaks on the Blackened, ashened faces of stunned children as they weep for mercy.

The relentless Propaganda machine pounds at their wee little hearts & destroys all that carelessly fall into its merciless path of indeterminable wholesale destruction.

At night, you can still hear the children cry out, as the desert wind stops to blow & the shadows fall, onto the sinners beautiful suntanned faces, as they crawl thru the valley of death in drunken disorder to end up just another, nameless, faceless, casualty of war by days end.

The Boulevard of Broken dreams was built on the blood of the innocent. As the neon signs that illuminate the night & hide the rot of the valley by day, shatters like cheap glass into the mouths of those that get so close that they can actually taste, feel & smell the rancid decay of death that permeates the hollow hollywood air.

Oxygen so thin, the altitude so high, that they can hardly breathe, as they gasp at their last breath of silence, as the blood drips down from their battered hands clutching their Emmys, Oscars & Golden Globes that can be bought in Tijuana for a pittance.

The old school stars know better than to play with matches, but the newcomers never learn. They march in, day after day, arriving by bus, train & planes, clutching onto their dreams... These fresh faced innocents think that they will not get burned by the shimmering lights that shine from the plastic streets that scream of fame & fortune... These streets only bring darkness & decent into madness to the many who have failed & lost their way.

These dreamers, these schemers, of whom most likely, no one will ever be seen or heard from again... for that is the way of the She Demon that prances in the daylight & masquerades as a pretty harlot. But as night comes, the true light shines down from the hills & unmasks the rotten, befouled devil that is the true Hollywood...... in the never ending cycle that eats up & spits out the weak & innocent into the streets like broken toys a child throws away from boredom.

Like vampires... the bloodlust never ends... And once the innocents have been turned... Like a trick in the night... They to, in turn, become the masters keepers of the gates of delusions, as the new ones come running into & at, the shiny bright lights of hollywood.. These lights, that attract so many, like a moth to a flame, are nothing what you think they are... These decoys of illumination are nothing other than a train... A train that is coming straight at you... ready to run you over & vanquish your soul. Another lamb... left to slaughter.

For that, my dear friends, Is the True Hollywood. What no book, magazine, or person will ever dare talk about or tell you. For she is a mistress without a heart or soul & she will steal your dreams & blind your eyes. And then, just for spite, she will steal your children's dreams & still come back for more, until the blood has gone dry & she has sucked the life out of all your brethren.

But I still miss Hollywood... Each & everyday.... I still dream of her... For I am smitten... I am hooked...

For I am... Craig Amabello... An X-Hollywood Reject... Who terribly misses his Home.


P.S: I gotta get a 3 picture deal, just for starters, so that I can catch up to my hero.... Sam Raimi.

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