I will begin by saying that if you are planning to attend this festival you should attempt to purchase tickets ahead of time to avoid waiting in rush lines. The churches on the island double as screening rooms, so get there early for a pew up front. There is no ascending seating. Something about everyone being equally close to God I heard.

Rumor has it that there were a number of impressive films screening that week. Unfortunately a combination poor intuition and bad recommendations led me into the gates of Naptime theater. I caught a shorts program that evening which was "for the birds" as they say. I was happy to see Kent Osborne in a short called THE PIPE Directed by Dan Brown about a pill-popping paramedic and a stoic security guard work the midnight shift, protecting the air-pipe of a radio personality who has been buried alive as a publicity stunt. This was definitely worth seeing; granted I am partial to Kent Obsourne (The YouTube short where he scores over-the-pants action with an ottoman. It is good for a laugh http://gawker.com/news/cahiers-du-cinéma/couch+humping-masterpiece-inspires-blog+related-homage-261031.php).

After killing time at Tacos Tacos it was movie time again. Flipping through the programming guide, my curiosity for physical mutations got the best of me "Part horror film, part erotic/moral debate", something about Christian confusion, incest and vagina dentate... sounded like a sure thing. Of course I am talking about the feature narrative TEETH directed by Mitchell Lichtenstein. (He is the son of Roy Lichtenstein for any pop art enthusiasts out there. Yay! primary colors!) Okay, back to the movie. Jess Weixler stars as a high school bible-brandishing beauty. While preaching the gospel in a perky teen fashion (which reminded me of a similar film SAVED), she starts to think dirty things about a doe eyed classmate who is also a supposed Jesus freak. Long story short. She loses her virginity after being knocked unconscious and the cutie-turned-rapist loses his manhood. From that point on it is a simple case of INSERT, DETACH, REPEAT. Same characters, same expression, just transported to new locations. Kinda like a family slideshow, except for the increasingly graphic genital butchery. So, I won't give away the rest, because I am not quite sure what the point is anyhow. The upside: Jess Weixler. She was the only facet of this film that kept my eyes out from behing my eyelids. I do hope to see more of her.

Two more hours spent in a church...LOW AND BEHOLD. I was excited to score a great pew, everything seemed to be looking up. Little did I know that I would be praying about twenty minutes in for a projector malfunction. I had a few recommendations from seemingly reliable sources that this was a great film. The film follows a boring unlikable twenty-something who is going to aid his uncle in taking advantage of the hurricaine victims via insurance claim shenannigans. Him, his uncle and vagrant that he finds wandering around form a near-ensemble cast with about as much dramatic subtlety as the three stooges. No offense intended to the stooges. To try to describe facets of the characters is a waste of time. None of them can act, they are equally unlikable and one-dimensional. But only two out of the three are also radically annoying. The characters wander around, there is no direction in the film and no one scene really moves the film forward.

Looking at the subject matter, it had the same problem for me as TEETH. Whether you are talking about genital deformity or the devastation of Hurricane Katrina, having a shocking topic just isn't enough. With a palatte as rich to draw from as Hurricane Katrina I expect to feel something... besides drowsy. I do not know the director so I do not want to make any assumptions, but I feel like this film exploited the Hurricane Katrina disaster to get an easy-in to festivals and recognition. If you want to see a truly touching and honest look at the personal wreckage in New Orleans, check out KAMP KATRINA. This film was playing at the same time as LOW AND BEHOLD at the Independent Film Festival of Boston. The directors David Redmond and Ashley Sabine did not spend large sums of money producing this as did LOW AND BEHOLD. They arrived at New Orleans with hardly a crew and a minimal budget. They shared accomodations with the residents of one of the most beat-up and physically dangerous regions. The story they find in this community hits deep chords that remind you how powerful films can be. That you do not need a big budget to affect people. The honesty of this film has limited its options for distribution since it is not the TV friendly version to which we have been exposed. Check out their site. It is something every independent filmmaker should see. http://www.carnivalesquefilms.com/kamp_katrina.html

To be fair, the films that I repeatedly heard were great at the festival were CANVAS, BROKEN ENGLISH, THE DEVIL CAME ON HORSEBACK, BEGGING NAKED, PRETTY IN THE FACE, GREAT WORLD OF SOUND and YEAR OF THE FISH (The last three were also shown at The independent Film Festival of Boston, and I somehow haven't managed to see them yet).

I should be writing something positive when I see THE LIVES OF OTHERS again this week. See that film. I know it sounds boring to some. Trust me.